Ok seriously, I do work with total retards (no offense to retards). Take this "for instance". A girl I work with is totally dissatisfied with her position but she does nothing anyway, I guess I would be bored too. I will send out emails explaining new processes or issues to avoid and she will come down to my desk 3 days later with a "problem" that has already been addressed in said email (and also comes complete with a handy solution). When I calmly state that I have just recently sent out this email she responds gaily "oh I don't read emails from you, I just delete them!" Oh yeah?! Well I don't waste my time on douche-nozzles and I'd like to fucking DELETE YOU!! Then she tells me that she prefers to "talk to me" to get the answers, like she's doing me a fucking favor! HELLO MORON, the reason I send emails is to avoid contact with you lower creatures!!
So according to the posters in the back of the office by the copiers (which btw are giving me fucking cancer) it is not acceptable to punch a co-worker in the face* so alas I have to suck it up and contain my rage and forward the email to her while she pouts about *someone being a bad mood*. IN A BAD MOOD?? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? Does she honestly think I would be in a good mood when she so clearly makes my life a living, miserable hell?! She turns my desk into a goddamn Hades!! How she gets past that fucking dog, I don't know. Tell me, what other company would allow this bullshit to take place?? But this is not the end, oh noooooo!
Today she tells me that she was offered a promotion to, wait for it....
THE JOB SHE ALREADY HAS!!!
How fucking incompetent is this department that they don't even know what a person who has been working here for like 2 years, DOES?!?!?! Are we living in a Seinfeld episode?? Fucking ridiculous, useless, no good asshole wasters, all of them. No wonder she doesn't do her job, no one knows what it is, so she can't get busted for not doing it! Where is that goddamn drink...
*I read them while shovelling a calming snickers bar down my throat
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