I JUST NEED AN EFFING SAMMY!!!

I was at the deli the other day getting a sandwich and there was a woman there getting her months worth of groceries in the form of cold cuts. So while the line is expanding she's ordering shit like "1/3 pound of honey ham, 2/5's of turkey ham, 3/4 of a pound of low sodium swiss cheese..." WTF lady?!?!?! While we're young, ok?? I swear every time another person came in she ordered something else "2 pounds of macaroni salad, 1/2 pound of cole slaw, 2/3 of LEAN ROAST BEEF..." FUCK. All the while my dog is outside shouting obscenties and people are forming a crowd asking "is this dog abandoned??, oh the poor thing, has anyone seen its owner?" and that lady is still going on about "1/2 of roast turkey, 1/2 of smoked turkey, oh what is that? are those roasted peppers? I'll take some of those, WHAT? Oh, 1/4 of pound is good..." Jesus fucking christ. After another 10 minutes of this, I left and got chinese next door. Now they know how to move a line!