Wednesday, May 30, 2007

I WISH I MAY, I WISH I MIGHT

The company I work for just relocated a few months ago to an "up and coming" area, which for now means construction on every fucking block. Streets are blocked off, orange traffic cones everywhere, cement being hosed off the streets, its a fucking mess.
Anyway, for like the first month of commuting there, all these sweaty, muscular construction men are toiling away and NOT ONE CATCALL!! I mean what kinds of men are these, too busy working to shout something degrading and filthy at me?! So I was bitching about this lack of interest a few weeks ago and seriously, be careful what you wish for. Since I had my bitch-fest, I've run into the same construction worker that was part of the crew that was working on the building across the street from me and would like stalk me at like 5:30 am when I would go for my run, I've had men shout "me so horny, me love you long time" (I'm asian, so obviously that's how I would speak in moments of sexual intimacy), and I've had the runtiest guy on a crew follow me 3 blocks down 10th Ave. holding out his phone asking me to put my number in it.

This is not what I wanted. I'm going to clarify my wish now. God, are you there? It's me. I want the hot, beefy, hunky, porn star like construction workers to ogle me. Some whistling would be perfect. I don't need words, I don't need them to follow me around, I don't need a gang of men making disgusting noises and gestures. I just need one stereotypically gorgeous Stanley Kowalski-esque, dripping in sexuality, type construction worker, to whistle at me, do a double take, bang a hammer onto his thumb because he was so distracted by my beauty, you know something obvious but not lewd. Once a week is fine, I'm not one of those needy women who need constant validation that they "still got it". (Those women are LAME! hahaha) Is this too much to ask??


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