I'M OVER THESE PEEPS

What is with everyone these days? Why is everyone a complete pussy?! I am so sick and tired of everyone bitching and moaning and crying about things they can’t control. I just want to shake these people. This all started last week when a friend of mine started bitching about the office hours that her doctor keeps, apparently this doctor keeps 9-5 hours and this displeases her. According to her “doctors are in the service profession and they should keep hours that are convenient for all patients”. Is she kidding me?! Doctors are doctors, they don’t give a shit about you, if you’re sick you’ll find the time to go to them, they know that, we know that, that’s the agreement. Doctors don’t HAVE to keep later hours just because some people might find that convenient, that’s why you shop around and find one who does. Otherwise you are at their mercy of whomever you pick. And not for nothing, but its not like this was even her GP, it was some doctor that lasered a sun spot off her foot!! Give me a fucking break.

Then the whole Jet Blue thing. All these whiney asswipes crying about having to be snowed in and then JB issues a “Passengers Bill of Rights” to appease these people and they put a full page ad in the papers basically groveling at all these people’s feet. Remember when corporations said “fuck you, we’re big and rich and you can kiss my 24 karat gold plated ass!”?!?! Now they pander to these babies because they are so afraid of pissing some candy ass with a blog, off. Hey whiners, its fucking weather, planes get grounded, you get delayed, it totally sucks but it’s an act of God. AN ACT OF GOD. No one can control it. So stop bitching and think about what you can do to make it easier. I’m tired of your sob stories.

Then Jeffrey Chodorow, a restaurateur in NYC, most famous for opening that crappy Rocco DiSpirito restaurant that was on TV, spent $80k on a full page ad in the NYTimes to cry about a bad review he got from their food critic! Eighty fucking thousand dollars!! Are you shitting me?! This pompous, over-indulged, megalomaniacal douchewad spent that much money on the same publication that skewered (and they weren’t the only ones, in fact they weren’t the only ones that WEEK to do so) and he thinks that’s being mature?? Just because you spend a lot of money to open another over-blown, over-hyped, over-priced restaurant DOES NOT mean that you deserve anything more than being able to keep that place open. This is NYC, hundreds of restaurants a year open and 90% (that number is probably not still accurate but its close!) of them close within ONE year here. The fact that you can con moronic wannabe d-list celebrities and their accompanying star fuckers and fat gossip bloggers into spending $150 for a fucking piece of meat should be reward enough. Remember when money was everything? Not anymore, now everyone needs praise and rewards and 4 fucking stars. Grow up Chodorow. Take the money and run. Fuck critics. Everyone in NY is a critic, that what makes us NY’er’s. We’re not going to get suckered into liking shit just because you tell us, we’re gonna tell you its shit and we’re gonna LAUGH AT YOU. This is not done to be mean, it’s done to toughen you up. If you don’t like it, move to Kansas. In fact, do that anyway.

And all these Park Slope parents who think they have every right to infiltrate your favorite restaurants at 8pm on a Saturday night with strollers and diaper bags and crying brats, who freak out if anyone dares get offended by watching them breastfeeding an infant (who if they are being breastfed should be in fucking bed already) at the table, or if the 3 star French restaurant they are at can’t serve their spawn mac & cheese and chicken nuggets and get all huffy when there is no microwave in the kitchen for you to mix some foul paste that is all organic and gluten free and will basically turn your child gay. Give me break already, move to LI; get a babysitter if you want to go out and feel like you’re still young and hip, but you have no right to ruin mine and everyone else’s meal just because we don’t feel like countering your breeding skills. Being able to get impregnated does not give you license to take over the fucking world! When I was growing up kids never went out to restaurants and they were seen and not heard the rest of the time!

I do agree that media (and therefore the public, me, you, US!) feed this cranky beast. I can’t watch the news for news anymore because I end up getting the newscasters opinion and the channel/station/corporation slant that they want to give the story and its exhausting to have to pick through that and get the news itself. And the news now isn’t even news, its tabloid reporting on celebrities that makes me sick. I don’t need to see Britney’s breakdown or know the contents of Anna Nicole’s fridge in the Bahamas. This isn’t news, yet this and other similar “stories” are on every channel, every day, every night and its enough already, I mean isn’t there a war going on somewhere? Did I hear something about starving children in Africa? And then in order to keep some semblance of reality and gravitas, news channels report on people’s complaints (Help Me Howard on ABC, Shame on You on Fox, etc), or they talk to the man on the street, or they report on local “news” stories (woman with fat cat, kid that count backwards, you know what I’m talking about). This kind of “reality” reporting coupled with the incredible amount of reality television on the air these days makes EVERYONE think they should be famous, everyone thinks its their RIGHT to be recognized and catered to, and elevated to “better than you” status and they don’t even have to have to have talent or even DO anything! It’s just ridik now. It wasn’t too long ago where you got recognition from working hard, being responsible, dealing with your problems quietly and with a minimum of fuss. You grew up and became an adult and took care of yourself and your family. You busted your ass, you made and saved money and then you retired and then you could enjoy life. And that was that. So no, I’m sorry but you don’t “deserve a break today”. You don’t get to have it “your way”. You don’t get an “easy button”. You have to earn these things. We as a society have to go back to basics and that means starting with the kids and parenting and learning the value of hard work and the satisfaction of doing a job well and not needing to have an audience every time you give a homeless guy money or forget to wear underwear. I’m tired of people complaining about how hard life is - that’s life, and it IS fucking hard, deal with it.

So to wrap up this super lengthy, soapboxy, rant here my words of wisdom: pets die, service is shitty, not everyone loves your kid, boyfriends and girlfriends cheat, there will be traffic, people will lie to you, you will not get recognition for every good deed. Let it go or go fuck yourself but please stop crying about it.